Chapter 294 It doesn't hurt much

7 month 15 day.

late at night.

"I'm too timid."

"Even if I came out earlier, Brother Su Ming wouldn't just sit there and wait for that monster to kill me, right?"

"..."

The slender white fingertips clung to Su Ming's ribs.

"Skylark. When I was very young, I often saw her peeking out of the window alone."

"The room was very small. Besides the bed, there were only dolls and a baby. I had never thought of escaping, but I was always staring outside... In the end, even the windows were boarded up."

Her nails dug slightly into Su Ming's flesh.

"..."

Su Ming was able to move her hand away easily.

"Why does Brother Su Ming hate me so much?"

"It is because of me that Yun Que can live. She and I have been one since childhood... I gave her decades of life. In fact, I am a good person."

"..."

The thing that resides in Setis's body is getting stronger.

Its past?

“I don’t remember.”

"I just know that Little Skylark needs me very much..."

"..."

Its purpose?

"Originally, Xiao Yunque didn't hate me at all, but because of Brother Su Ming's appearance, she started to hate me~"

"So, only Brother Su Ming must die."

"..."

It is impossible to get good results through verbal negotiations.

Are you afraid?
Su Ming felt that it was giving him psychological hints. But it was undeniable that after just two days, it had become more difficult to deal with.

The skin on my hands wasn't just peeling, I was also experiencing a noticeable stinging sensation all over my body. In some places the skin had completely peeled off, and a small amount of blood was oozing out.

"Suck~"

She calmly stuck out her tongue and licked the blood.

"If what entered my body wasn't some stinky thing, but blood instead... maybe I would like it very much."

"..."

There was no point in grabbing her throat. In the end, there was no way to kill her.

I can only tie her hands and feet like this. I have never slept.

7 month 16 day.

early.

"Brother Ming...didn't you sleep well?"

It's normal to notice your bad complexion after not being able to get a proper rest for three consecutive days.

"No."

"Isn't it good to be healthy? I... won't change into clothes that seduce you before going to bed."

"..."

It certainly doesn't make sense to keep using the excuse that I couldn't help myself because her sleeping face is so cute.

Have to find a normal place to sleep.

7 month 16 day.

noon.

Su Ming moved to a small room and hung several wind chimes at the door that would tinkle when shaken gently.

Even if you can't have a deep sleep, you won't be too tired as long as you can take a nap.

7 month 16 day.

in the afternoon.

Su Ming just relaxed for a little while.

"It's a woman wearing a robe and a mask!"

"I saw it with my own eyes... She suddenly came to Si'er and asked her if she was pretty. I thought Si'er was lucky... Gu."

"Who knows? I didn't see it clearly...Sir's head is gone."

"..."

A murder occurred in Curry Town.

People were clamoring to catch the real culprit, and members of the Explorers Guild spontaneously formed a team to search together with the authorities.

And Thetis was in the inn wearing her robe.

There was blood all over the clothes.

She smiled charmingly and stared at Su Ming.

"Yeah, when Brother Su Ming felt sleepy before, he would hug Yun Que...rub her until she was satisfied and then fall asleep soundly."

"It's not okay to treat people differently~"

"How to do it?"

"I accidentally killed the bad guy. It's all blood... Yeah, the blood soaked through the robe and onto the white socks inside. It's Brother Su Ming's favorite white silk stockings with bows~ Yun Que seems to like it too."

"What should we do?"

"If you don't clean it up quickly, the little skylark will be scared, right?"

"..."

Su Ming clenched his fists. But he could only watch her lying on the bed with her hands clasped together, and the blood stained the sheets again.

7 month 16 day.

Night.

"Eh? That... she's wearing it."

Thetis looked at the white silk and robes hanging in the window in confusion. But she didn't know that not only those were washed, but also the sheets under her drum were changed to new ones. It was just that it was exactly the same as the original one and it was not noticeable.

"I came back and saw you sleeping soundly, so I used it. Is that weird?"

Su Ming spread his hands.

"..."

Sertis looked down at her toes, her ears gradually turning red.

"Am I really that good when I'm asleep? Brother Ming just felt better, and then..."

"..."

How long will this kind of life last?
I have to take Thetis with me, but I also have to find a way to kill her. It's a clear sign, right? Tell yourself, don't think about going anywhere.

7 month 17 day.

early.

"The woman in the black robe?"

"never seen it."

"..."

The searchers finally found the hotel.

But Su Ming had already disposed of the clothes that Sertis used to commit the crime. And he happened to go out shirtless, so Sertis had no clothes inside and could only curl up in the quilt.

"This early in the morning... I'm really lucky."

"Damn, I don't know where this murderer came from. It hasn't happened in years."

The searchers didn't even think about entering the house anymore and left with complaints.

"..."

Su Ming closed the door and turned his back to Cetis.

"Brother Su Ming...Pao Zi, are you looking for me?"

"No. I heard that a woman in a black robe killed a businessman. Burn your robe in advance to prevent someone from seeing you and associating you with the incident seven or eight years ago because of the inexplicable murderer."

"..."

How long can I last if I can’t sleep every day?

It was strange that Su Ming had not seen the 'Abyss' for three consecutive days. Sertis was just sleeping normally.

7 month 19 day.

suddenly.

Su Ming didn't see it for two consecutive days. Sertis was just sleeping normally.

7 month 20 day.

early morning.

Exhausted physically and mentally, Su Ming saw a small figure floating by the window. He understood.

It was normal for him not to be afraid of himself, because before he found a way to kill it alone, he knew that he couldn't do it.

But the petite figure in front of him was different. She didn't care about Sertis's life.

"Brother, you look tired."

"..."

"Killing him will be better."

This is the difference between her and Xiaoye. If it were Xiaoye, she would think about how to save Cetis based on her own experience and ideas.

7 month 19 day.

Two o'clock in the morning.

On the rooftop of the hotel, Loli smoothed the hem of her skirt and sat there, motioning Su Ming to lie down.

"Big brother, this time I'm not lying down in anger."

"..."

There was no time to get angry. Besides, it was just a pillow on my knees.

"Not really, just lie down happily."

Ok.

I really can't be happy.

"..."

Su Ming was silent for a moment, then spoke, "Have you found what you were looking for?"

"No. But I know where it is."

"..."

In other words, come back specially before actually setting off.

silence.

"Big Brother, it will become stronger and stronger."

"I know."

"Using human addition and subtraction, if you give up her, Big Brother will be able to see five wives."

"..."

"If I don't abandon her, my elder brother will probably die."

"I won't die."

"Big Brother will not be able to win one day."

"..."

"Big brother, do you want to go to bed?"

If the loli in front of you is there, the abyss will not come out.

Is there really no way to single out the abyss and solve it?
"No. Her body is not made up of human components. If big brother wants to kill it, he has to kill the carrier together with it."

"Why does Big Brother hate doing addition and subtraction?"

Where is the addition and subtraction?

This is not the trolley problem. There is a stranger on one side and five strangers on the other. If this is the case, Su Ming can even choose not to save either side.

The question is, who is a stranger?
"But, big brother loves my sister very much. Won't he want to go back in the end?"

"Killing her now or killing her at the end when it's very difficult, the latter choice is meaningless no matter how you look at it."

"..."

"I hate making choices, too. I want to get a part of my body back as soon as possible, but then I think of this: humans are easily taken advantage of when they are sad. Although I don't quite understand what "take advantage of" means...but big brother didn't lie on my lap angrily again."

Su Ming thought of a possibility.

If we can take Sertis back directly, will Xia Ye be able to make it afraid to come out?

"No way."

"Big Brother's hometown is full of negativity."

"He'll complain about not getting paid for overtime, having to work on his days off, car loans, mortgage payments... and a lot of his favorite foods."

"She will become very strong. She will become a form that I can't kill even if I come out to look for something. Then big brother will be even more sad."

Does this guy even know about mortgages and car loans?

I became a monster that even the little loli in front of me couldn't handle. I'm sorry that my hometown, the snow country society, is full of pressure.

"Now, big brother can still solve it easily."

"..."

solve what?
If it were possible to just kill Sertis with a wave of the hand, I would have done it long ago.

Now I just want to sleep after a long absence.

"Brother, did I make a mistake?"

"No, I shouldn't ask you to lick it. Instead, I just need to agree when you want to lick it. Then it will become a happy thing to do."

"..."

"I'm going to take my body back. Big brother, please continue to live, okay? If you die, I might be as sad as humans say, and unhappy."

Actually, just stay here.

You don't need to see anything, just talk. Just ask the little loli to help you solve it, just pretend you know nothing.

In the end, even if you try your best to find someone who knows the 'Witch of the Abyss', in the end you still have to kill them. What's the point?
7 month 21 day.

Night.

The little loli came quickly and left quickly, as if she had come to say goodbye.

Logically speaking, without her, the Abyss would emerge. But up to now, there has been no abnormality in Thertis.

"……Well."

He pinched her wantonly, ignoring the shyness of Sertis.

What's there?

Even if you are killed in deep sleep, the worst that can happen when you wake up is just reloading the save file.

7 month 22 day.

early.

not dead.

"What does Brother Ming like to eat?"

"..."

Didn’t you just give up cooking a long time ago?

"The book says that you have to learn to cook. My wife... knows how to cook."

Those were the old times.

In today's society, it is quite common for men to know how to cook.

"Besides, just counting the number of times... the book says that men will consume a lot of energy after that and their bodies will become weak."

"..."

Will not.

How many times has it come now?

"239 times. Recently... have I done something well? I feel like Brother Ming is really amazing."

I just feel that the shivering Skylark doesn't think about too many problems at all, and is just concerned with endurance.

7 month 23 day.

Night.

"Brother Su Ming, I'm so scared... She's so scary. Just smelling the scent on Brother Su Ming makes me feel terrible."

"What on earth is she?"

"..."

do not know.

How could I possibly know something that even the abyss didn't know?

"Would Brother Su Ming have the heart to ask her to kill someone?"

"..." "So happy. Brother Su Ming is the best~"

Su Ming got goosebumps all over his body and stared at Sertis coldly.

"Pfft... You just kept asking me to serve you, and now you're looking at me like that. I didn't even complain about Brother Su Ming getting his body dirty with such a stinky thing~ I like Brother Su Ming, too."

"..."

This time, the Abyss Witch did not take any action, but simply touched Su Ming's cheek with her fingertips. Then she withdrew her hand.

"I won't put it in Brother Su Ming's stomach again~ I can't beat Brother Su Ming now."

"In the end, I will definitely be pressed to the floor by Brother Su Ming in this way and that way... and my hands and feet will be tied pitifully. How humiliating~"

"So, until we can kill Brother Su Ming, we won't do anything else."

"..."

Little loli is right.

There is no point in continuing this trend. We are just waiting for our opponents to become stronger, making simple tasks more and more complicated.

Su Ming clenched his fists and then opened them.

"Can you find a new carrier?"

"what?"

"Anyone here will do except Sertis."

"all right."

"..."

Su Ming looked at her straight.

"As long as Brother Su Ming kisses my feet like he did to Skylark, that's fine. From thighs to toes, Brother Su Ming can kiss wherever he likes."

"..."

This is actually a joke, right?

"Hehe, it's itchy."

Done.

"Yes, even though Brother Su Ming knew it was definitely a lie... he still came to kiss me. I'm so envious and jealous... Brother Su Ming actually likes me so much."

"Goo-"

Grabbing her slender neck, she was still smiling.

"Yes... Little Skylark needed me before."

"Only then can we coexist with others. Little Skylark didn't care about his body in the past few decades... Don't you think that's too much, Brother Su Ming?"

"It's been almost seventy years. It's time for someone else to take their turn."

"They didn't do anything, but humans always want to possess them and kill them... so we have no choice but to kill them all. Brother Su Ming's murderous intent is also very good food."

She was able to easily resist immunity and corrode Su Ming's wrist. The white flesh burst open, and the flowing blood gradually dyed the flesh red.

7 month 30 day.

Night.

Brother Su Ming has been acting strange lately.

Even when he hugged me, he didn't seem that happy.

Sometimes I snuggled up to him and it took a long time for Brother Su Ming to react.

"..."

There have been several murders in Curry Township.

Wearing a robe.

Wearing a veil.

I'm not stupid. Even if I didn't know the sheets were changed the first time, but so many times... the hair that was there is gone. So neat.

I have thought about going back many times.

Brother Su Ming likes the woman I once met so much, "going back" should be a joyful thing.

But I never saw joy once.

"almost."

He always said it was almost time, and after that he would either hold my sock-wrapped feet in his hands, or suddenly rub or kiss them.

I have a guess.

Is it possible that there is no way to take me back?
Maybe I did something wrong and they don't want to take me back?
"how is this possible?"

"Look, this is all thanks to you..."

Brother Su Ming openly shows the part that makes me shy.

The book says that if a man is really tired of you, he won't even bother to be perfunctory, let alone greet you with a smile like this... It's like he's trying to hold back some emotion to comfort me.

There is a secret.

But he refused to tell me the secret.

I have never wanted to think about the other side, because I have already won, otherwise I would never have waited until now.

There are no marks on my wrists now, but they did appear before.

Brother Su Ming said that he couldn’t help it when I was asleep.

But why... even if I wanted to pretend to be asleep and see how I could not help myself, I never had any memory of that kind of scene?
What is there to tie me up for?

"..."

While Brother Su Ming was out buying dinner, I stood in the bathroom, staring at my pale face in the mirror.

"come out."

"Is it you? I won once, so I can win a second time!"

I'm not afraid of it.

I could win before, and I can win now.

No matter what it says, I will not be shaken by anything Brother Su Ming says. He has come back. I am stronger than before.

But no matter how I urged her, no matter how I talked to her in the mirror...there was no response.

"lark?"

Until Brother Su Ming came back and looked at me in surprise.

Is it a mistake?

wrong.

Brother Su Ming stood there holding the bag... in pain.

I know something else.

Some of them were discovered when I was kissing Brother Su Ming unconsciously.

"Brother Su Ming."

"This morning... there's a bruise on my shoulder."

They said I scratched it, but I cut my nails short after they said that last time.

Brother Su Ming was with me most of the time, and even when we were out, I never saw him showing interest in other women. Or, as the book says, after I held him tightly, he didn't have the energy to show interest.

"It... caught him?"

My voice was shaking.

If this is the case, then the victory I thought I had... was actually just torturing Brother Su Ming.

"Eat first."

"..."

"Don't worry about it, I've found a way to solve it."

Deceiving.

If he had found a way, why would he still smile so artificially when several people died? He didn't look lecherous at all.

I don't want to eat.

I don't want to change to white stockings with bow leg rings. If I am the only one who is happy all the time, I...

"It's really okay. Although there was a little incident, it will be over in the next two days."

"do not trust me?"

"..."

Even if you grab my shoulders and say this, wipe away my tears.

"Look, I'm fine, right? It's just a matter of time."

What kind of person is Brother Su Ming?
I felt it was strange from the beginning. He had the desire but retreated because my body could not support it. He could just focus on showing his desire, but he would accompany me to read books that he was not interested in. He didn't need to buy armor to show me, but he still brought it back.

In the past, when I couldn’t control the pollution, everyone was afraid of me. It was also Brother Su Ming who came to me.

8 month 3 day.

Night.

I still can't remember anything after falling asleep. Even if I sit in bed and don't plan to sleep, I will still lose consciousness without realizing it.

Even if Brother Su Ming keeps silent about it, I can confirm it.

"Yeah. It's getting stronger."

"It's time for me to show off my best skills. Don't worry."

How can I continue to count as before with peace of mind?
I know that Brother Su Ming has a strong ability to heal himself. So, what kind of wounds were they originally that were still clearly visible after I woke up?
The face in the mirror will never respond. It's like it's mocking you, saying 'I never won'.

Will I never be able to get rid of it?

Even though I feel like I'm gradually getting back to my original personality. I'm becoming more shy and less jealous. I'm getting better.

"Brother Su Ming, if it comes out again."

"..."

"Kill Skylark."

If there is really no other way. Before she feeds on my hatred and tempts me to become something I am no longer myself. Before I lose... kill me first.

"It's not that serious. It will take some time. The injury was caused by my haste in trying to understand her structure."

"..."

Let alone winning or losing, I didn't even have the chance to confront it again.

I used to be a real miss.

She was just a little girl who was always beaten and scolded because she was too partial to certain subjects. Later, she was dragged out and treated as a monster and almost beheaded.

"Brother Su Ming, I changed into a pair of leg rings with bows. But they are not white silk."

"is black."

"?"

I won't say anything more about 'it'.

I was indeed very jealous of the women who had appeared beside Brother Su Ming. I admired them very much.

So, even if you don't take me back, with that beautiful woman around, I'll have a bow leg ring that looks better than mine... No matter how much I eat and gain some weight, I'm still not as pretty as her.

8 month 3 day.

late at night.

"Skylark, don't do this."

"..."

I was going to do it again. I could scratch my temples with my bare hands when I was in pain, and I can do it now.

"..."

My palms were covered in blood. My head was bandaged by Brother Su Ming.

Why didn't you tell me?
Why do you only comfort me until now and don't want me to do anything?

I won once.

I won once, but now Brother Su Ming's injury is getting worse. Is it because I hate it so much?

Is it true that it would be better if I were not around?

"...Brother Su Ming."

"I... uh, what should I do?"

But I want to go back with Brother Su Ming. I want to believe that there is really a way.

I also miss the hands that hold me and the warmth that covers the back of my head.

At least tie me up and don't make me do anything I absolutely don't want to do. I don't like chains, but I don't like... The next day, I woke up and saw that Brother Su Ming had injuries caused by me.

8 month 10 day.

I can't stay in Curry Town anymore.

Although there were no more murders, Brother Su Ming would always try to stop them. Plus, more and more people were suspicious of me. I had no choice but to leave.

I found that Brother Su Ming had gone crazy and no longer concealed his mistake, looking everywhere for someone who might be able to solve the problem.

But that only led to me gradually starting to get noticed again.

"..."

I miss many things. Whether it's knowing that I don't want to call him "Ming brother" as before, or asking me to keep it.

Still said without reservation that he liked my feet.

Or he would just take me out normally, and then be surprised when I told him I knew everything... Or he would wait for me to serve him with the knowledge from the weird books I had read, and then he would feel comfortable and unable to stop himself from having thoughts about me.

I cherish these things. I want to always be the woman he talks about who is sometimes shy, sometimes bold, and who he can't understand. Rather than a monster.

I also know that the more malice is directed towards me, the stronger I will become. If this continues, one day... I will really kill Brother Su Ming.

[It seems that Xiao Yunlark finally understood]

[At first I was just surprised that Skylark would actually reach into his brain for the sake of the humans he hated. I was really scared~ Then, I thought, if I couldn't wait any longer, how much resentment would I feel? ]

[If I waited until then... and just when I was about to be happy, Brother Su Ming suddenly died... How much hatred would I feel? ]

[Everything else is a meal replacement. Only you, Little Skylark...will be a constant source of food.]

Is it too late now?
Because of my attachment and hesitation, I didn’t have time to turn into a monster that could be easily killed.

[Hmm... I don't know. Brother Su Ming is very strange... Every time people think he is going to fail, he becomes stronger again. But recently he seems to have really reached his limit. ]

[But if Brother Su Ming wants to escape, I can't catch him~ It's not like Little Skylark, who has firmly grasped Brother Su Ming's heart. And Brother Su Ming also knows a very scary monster... As long as he escapes, I dare not chase him. ]

What I call winning is a joke.

I just kept torturing Brother Su Ming.

[I can’t die~ I’m the little skylark. Even if your head is chopped off, I won’t die~]

[What should I choose? If I give my body to you completely, Brother Su Ming will probably kill me mercilessly, right?]

[How many times? ]

[Yeah, almost every night. Brother Su Ming tied me up cruelly... and did this and that. Pfft, it's the same body... but Brother Su Ming has no interest in me at all. He almost pulled my intestines out, but he still refused to beat me~]

[Are you sad? I'm very happy. I'm full. I feel like I should be able to pull out Brother Su Ming's intestines this time... Yeah, if I really pull them out, I'm sure Brother Su Ming will be severely beaten? ]

I don't want to go on.

I am hopeless. Since I am no longer a young lady, I am no longer a human being. This is also the reason why I cannot get pregnant.

[Of course I can’t get pregnant. It’s smelly… I’m different from Little Skylark, I don’t like drinking it.]

Is it still not too late now?
Even if you can't kill me, there's no need to hold back on me since I'm a monster.

It's better to run away. Wait until I kill a lot of other people and then be killed by someone else. That would be good.

[Do you really want to give it all to me at once? ]

[If Xiao Yunque begs me like this, I will be soft-hearted... I won't attack Brother Su Ming.]

【…】

[Little Skylark knows that I am a monster, so isn't it normal for me to lie? Go kill Brother Su Ming now. Hatred is the right thing to do... That's how Little Skylark was at the beginning. He had endless hatred and wanted to kill everyone. I just wanted to satisfy Little Skylark's original intention. Brother Su Ming is also a human being. He is included in everyone.]

I had absolutely no control over my body.

【Time is up~】

[After killing Brother Su Ming, Little Skylark is very angry... Even if the scary monster that Brother Su Ming knows appears, I won't be that scared. People, the most unhappy thing is to see good things turn bad, Little Skylark, do you understand now? ]

Are you tired of playing already?

Could you please not come back again?
[Really? Where is Xiao Yunque going to control me? Brother Su Ming likes me so much, he will definitely come to find me. ]

【after all……】

[Brother Su Ming was caught by someone and his skin was torn to pieces, but he was reluctant to kill him. He is a perfect man. The killing intent he conveyed... is so delicious.]

For the first time, I hoped to hear Brother Su Ming say in person that he no longer needed me.

I should disappear quietly when I feel ugly.

[Don't be so sad. Brother Su Ming said... Even if he was killed, he would definitely not hate Xiao Yunque.]

"Shut up!!!"

I'll crush this body into pieces, chop off all the fingers, and gouge out the eyes.

I go to places where I can't feel the ill will of others. I become weaker.

Go somewhere where no one can find you.

I hate the tragic ending of the dancer and the knight. But now I understand that I am the same as the dancer... I don't want the knight to die together just to see me for the last time because of my identity. I can't be like the dancer, who blames the knight and then calmly holds the knight's hand and closes his eyes.

After all, Brother Su Ming has women who are much better than me. It's normal that I'm not good enough and don't have the qualifications to go back with Brother Su Ming.

"Pfft-"

I hit my wrist with a rock.

It doesn't hurt much.

(End of this chapter)